It was a beautiful day in PortHarbor.com. The sun was shining, the sky was a clear blue without a cloud in sight and the cool breeze made the day perfect. At a table looking towards the crystal blue waters of PortHarbor.com, Ma and Pa were enjoying their time together when Pa started talking about ‘the Internet Thing’ as he calls it.
“I don’t know what all this ‘Internet Thing’ stuff is that people are talking about,” Pa stated as he started his rant. “I tried using the computer before and the instructions said to press ‘any’ key to continue. After spending all the money for a computer, I was sold a bad keyboard. It didn’t have an ‘any’ key. I took the computer back and I was told that when the instructions said to press ‘any’ key, it meant to hit a key on the keyboard. So, I decided to give it another try, but after a week of hitting keys, the keyboard broke. And you know what else, Ma? The coffee cup holder broke and when I took it back, they told me that it wasn’t a coffee cup holder but something they called a CD drive? How stupid do they think I am? I’ve seen coffee cup holders like that in some of those expensive cars. Besides, who would want to be at a computer without a cup of coffee? Ma, do you know what else they said to me?”
“No, Pa.” Ma said hesitantly.
“I told them that I couldn’t find the off button to turn the computer off and they told me that there was no off button, that I had to press the start button. How stupid is that? I press the start button to start things. And you know what else? One time after I got the computer turned on, all of a sudden it just stopped working. And you know what they told me? They said that the computer crashed, and I would need to start it again. How could it crash when it wasn’t moving or doing anything?”
“Pa, you need to have a little patience. The computer can do so many things.” Ma started to explain.
“I know.” said Pa. “It can even crash while it is just sitting there. You know they even told me that I should put wallpaper on the desktop. Ma, you spent a lot of time refinishing that antique desk and they want me to cover it with wallpaper. Besides, wallpaper goes on the wall, not the desk.”
“Pa, I think they meant that you need to put a background on the computer screen.” Ma stated.
“Ma, if I did that, then how could I see the screen with the screen covered up? This is so stupid, and they want me to spend money on this stuff.” Pa continued.
Ma interrupted and said. “Pa, there are a lot of things that you could use the computer for.”
“You’re right, Ma. I can use it to raise my blood pressure with all of the nonsense.” Pa started to respond when he saw a man approach them.
“Hello, I couldn’t help but hear about some of your issues with using a computer. My name is Geekman and I would like to try to help you understand what the computer can be used for and how to use it. I agree with you that salespeople just want to get your money and they don’t care about helping you. Someone had to teach them, but now that they have some knowledge, they think that everyone should know all about computers. Would you mind if I join you both and tried to clear up some of this confusion?”
“Not at all.” said Ma. “That would be very nice of you. I am Ma, and this is my husband, Pa.”
“It’s nice to meet you both.” Geekman started to explain. “Let’s think of the computer like a telephone, and a TV and a radio, and a typewriter and the telegraph and even a camera all rolled into one.”
“It’s all of that?” asked Pa.
“Yes, and more. When you connect it to the Internet, it connects you to the biggest and fastest post office. This post office works instantly. The computer also connects you to the world’s largest library, magazine rack, and thousands of stores. You know how your TV can get some free channels and other channels you have to pay for? The Internet is like that. There are a lot of free things you can do.” Geekman continued to explain.
“You mean that we can do all that stuff with the computer?” Ma asked. “But how do we do that?”
“I would be happy to teach both of you.” said Geekman.
“Do you really think that you could teach Pa how to use the computer?” asked Ma.
“Yes.” Geekman stated with enthusiasm. “There is so much information in the cloud that you could access.”
“Isn’t that stuff going to get wet or blow away if it is in the cloud?” asked Pa.
“No, Pa. the cloud is part of the Internet, it is the part that stores information that you can retrieve with any device that is connected to the web. Just think of the cloud as another word for the web.” said Geekman.
“You mean like a spider web? So now we went from the cloud to a spider web. Why can’t these computer people just speak English? Why is it always GeekSpeak?” asked Pa.
“Pa, I can’t answer that, but what I can do is teach you and Ma ‘GeekSpeak’ in a blog called ‘GeekSpeak4Ma&Pa’ located at GeekSpeak.PortHarbor.com” offered Geekman.
“That would be nice.” said Ma. “But you are going to have to go slow. We don’t want to confuse Pa too much too fast.”
“Ma, I understand everything.” Pa started to say. Then he got a strange look on his face and asked. “Wasn’t there a horror movie called the Blog?”
“No, Pa. That was called the Blob. A blog is just a shortened version of the expression ‘weblog.” Think of it like an online journal or an informative website. It will display information from oldest to newest with the newest information appearing at the top. The ‘GeekSpeak4Ma&Pa’ blog will address a different topic in each post. All a person will need to do is signup to be notified whenever a new topic is posted to the blog. What do you think of that, Pa?” asked Geekman.
“I like that idea, don’t you, Ma?” asked Pa.
“Yes, and we both want to thank you for all your help. We are glad we met you, Geekman.” Ma stated. And with that, they all continued to enjoy the beauty and tranquility of PortHarbor.com.